As I write this, babyJo will be 6 months old soon. I’m now a working mom, after 16 weeks of maternity leave. To top that off, I started back in my graduate school program after taking a semester off when I first had the baby.

I wake up around 6:30 AM and pump (or feed the baby if he’s awake), get bottles ready for the day, put out the baby food, get ready and try to be out the door shortly after the nanny gets to the house. I get home from work and normally the timing works so the baby is ready to eat.

My plate is a bit overloaded at times. And my husband doesn’t help with the baby! Here’s why.

He’s His Daddy

When I was pregnant, mrJo and I talked a lot about this being our baby. Meaning we can both take care of him. It doesn’t just have to be me just because I’m the mama. And we’ve done just that.

Honestly, it took awhile for mrJo to get going. Motherly instincts are strong and I was able to adapt to the new life a lot quicker. It probably took me getting mastitis for him to really get it. Because he had to. I couldn’t feed the baby since I was on antibiotics and was either loopy or sleep from the pain meds.

When I have the baby I’m not “helping” mrJo. I’m his mom. Same applies as a dad.

He’s Bonding

Bonding time between baby and dad is just as important, to us, as between baby and mom. After babyJo was born, I started my 16 week maternity leave and mrJo started his 2 week paternity leave.

At the end of that 2 weeks he went back to work and I continued to bond 24/7. We started to notice little things that clearly hurt mrJo’s feelings. babyJo would only really look at me and smile at me. He didn’t pay attention to his daddy when he was in the room.

A couple of months later, mrJo got a new job and there was a 2 week gap between his last day and his first day. During that time, he spent as much time as he could with the baby. And it really made a difference! Also, that week before was when I got mastitis. So he really got 3 weeks of solid bonding time.

Since then, when mrJo comes in a room, babyJo is focused on him and only him! I actually get frustrated sometimes when I’m nursing him or trying to feed him bananas. He really stops everything to look, smile, and laugh at his daddy.

He Enjoys It

A couple of weekends ago mrJo told me “me and babyJo are going to the store!” He got stopped way too many times by people saying “awww you’re giving mom a break?”. Umm, what?

Okay wait. I will say that I enjoyed the nap I had while they were gone. But that’s not why he took him. He did it because he enjoys spending time with his son! When I take babyJo to the store, I’m just being a mom. Y’all, he’s just being a dad!

So, no – mrJo does not help me with the baby. We raise our son together.

What do you think about men “helping” with their baby? What about “babysitting”?